Afu Diary #12


Dated : 28-12-2015

It’s 3:17 in the morning…. Yet another restless night. Well! Not a bright start of my day.

To wake up every f**king morning and think of her is a torment. Every morning I wake up and my first thoughts are, ‘S**t! Another day! How am I gonna pass this? I should stop thinking about her. She doesn’t care for me. I shouldn’t too. I must be strong. I miss her. Miss her voice, her hands in mine, her suppressed smile, that funny mark on her face, that nodding of her head to every agreement ,that face she makes to every dislike, her tiny cute nose and some traces of hair on it, the dark lines under her eyes… Ahhh…..everything.’

Something I feel my fingers curling on their own and trying to grip hers. I realise she’s not here. Never will be again. At that instant, it feels all the oxygen has been sucked from my room. I struggle to breathe,literally. Sometimes, my eyes get watery. It makes me weaker, physically and mentally, everyday of my life. Then I tell myself ,’Don’t worry, just get up now. Don’t think of her. You are a very good man. You deserve better. Everything will be alright.’ I hope so……

PS photo credit Google


4 thoughts on “Afu Diary #12

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