Afu Diary #14

Life often put me in such a situation that it….make me fill like destiny never  wanted to see me happy….. I often lost the things which I want to hold it close to my heart….but…..

Dated 29-12-2015

I didn’t know break-up would be so easy for her and so disastrous for me. I still can’t believe it. It has clearly broken me beyond repair. For her it was simply like wishing good morning over the phone. For me it has been my worst nightmare. I wish I could delete just that one day from my life, just that one day.

She once said ‘Love is something which 2 people feel good for sometime… feel right’.

‘Sometime’ was too short in my case. Did she ever love me? Have I been used? Or am I intolerable and a pathetic person?

Unlike her I considered her more than a girlfriend. Loving someone too much can be one’s undoing. This should be the first lesson in school. I can only regret now.

She doesn’t even want to hear my voice or see me. What does she think of me now? I don’t know that. Rather, I don’t want to know that. My heart can only take so much. But I’m still holding on to her memories. They are all I have of her. Sweet as well as bitter memories.
I don’t know what happens to me next. My life is hanging on uncertainity. Will things turn out fine or will I be an unlucky soul?

Sometimes, only sometimes, I imagine her smiling face and it makes me smile. I remember anything funny she said and it makes my heart lighter. But all this lasts only for a few seconds, because soon after I am overcome with unbearable pain. I just lie on my bed till the pain subsides and try to put on a fake smile.

But, unfortunately, I’m not so good at faking happy tears.

I love you Afu
Your Hopeless Romantic

PS photo credit :: Google