Dear Jyoti,
Well I don’t know how to start. But I think all started nine years ago.
From the very first day I saw you, walking with your friends, I hated you. I really, really hated you. You were the kind of person I despised a lot, the nerd who was always so stuck up and such a goody-two-shoes. Little Miss Perfect. I had no intention of getting to know you at all. I think you realized that I was staring at you, so I quickly turned, and walked away, wondering what you’d look like without those tortoise shell glasses covering half your face. But I think fate had a different way of thinking things through. But you came and talked to me the very next day.
This is when I realized that you were smart, funny, and cute. To be frank, I was surprised. I didn’t expect that from someone like you. To me, people who turned to books all the time were boring and predictable. They were mostly unfriendly, and didn’t know how to enjoy their life. But you were different, and definitely not boring like I suspected. Well you were the most interesting person I’ve ever known.
I still remember you standing on the sidelines, your eyebrows scrunched up, a frown darkening your face as you’d watch me speed off into the distance. You really were a wreck, but you hid it well. And I know you were scared for me. It was endearing. That was when I realised three things about you-You cared for me, wanted me to be safe, but never held me back from my passion.
I loved how you tied your hair, braiding them tightly, unlike the other girls who let loose their locks all the time. That’s why when you finally did let your hair down on prom night, the guys couldn’t take their eyes off of you. You really looked like an angel from the skies that night. The way your midnight black eyes shone put the stars to shame that night. There was something about you that made me realize that I was a damn fool for not telling you the truth.
Then again, the fear crept in, and I started convincing myself that there was a lot to lose by telling you, namely our friendship. So I didn’t say what I wanted to, and spent the rest of the year with you, while you laughed that sweet, tinkling laugh, unaware of all the eyes on you. I think that is what makes you beautiful-The fact that you don’t know that you are. I could tell you a million times that you have the most angelic smile in the world that lights up everyone around you, but you would never listen. You would never accept that you are so much more than what you think you are. And you would never believe for a second what is the truth, that you are the best thing that’s ever been mine. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever chanced upon, inside out. But, when you finally removed those gigantic glasses and dressed up in layers of pale blue satin that made you look ethereal. That night, I don’t think I could ever forget, because I was finally able to go out with the one girl I truly loved, but could never have-You.
And when Rahul broke up with you, I told you that he was a jerk and acted like I was angry. I even promised that I would punch the weasel’s face, because I wanted to be your knight in shining armour. But I was smiling on the inside, because I could never stand the thought of another man with you. You’re mine. And I was about to tell you that when you cried in my arms that day, but I somehow stopped myself. Because three things about you-You were the nicest friend I ever knew, you were always there for me, and…You would never fall in love with your best friend.
The only reason why I moved from one girl to another was because I always knew that couldn’t have the person I really wanted, and couldn’t find her in anyone else either. I searched for someone like you, because I was too much of a coward to tell you that you were all I ever wanted. All those girls, well, they were beautiful…But they were not you. I tried to make you go away, to push you from my mind by being with them, but I never really succeeded. I hated how they’d all look at me and smile, because those smiles were never as beautiful as yours.
I was never really a shy person, and you know that more than anyone else. But I didn’t want to lose you by telling you how I felt. You were the only person who truly understood me, and I didn’t want you to go away. So I hid it. I hurt, but I hid it. Some say it is fearless to fall in love with your best friend, but I think it is even more fearless to tell them about it. Yes, I was a coward. I never told you. Well, I tried to prove but fail for you. That’s why I’m telling you now, and I hope I’m not too late.
Well now the only thing you need to know right now is I love you, I’ve always loved you, and I’ll never stop loving you.
Love
Amit
P.S:: Photo Credit Google
My diary 